Lessons from a CT School that Bans Phones

John Breunig, "The Darien Times"
“The Old Normal.”
I scribble the thought in cursive during a roundtable interview about the state’s new recommendation calling for public schools to consider prohibiting students from bringing personal tech into the classroom. For teachers and parents who grew up without digital handcuffs, it’s literally old school. But hitting reverse on technology doesn’t happen often in society. Most shoppers prefer someone else slice the bread. There aren’t paper maps under the car seat anymore. Even soaring electric bills haven't inspired a candle revival.

But I happen to be talking to someone who has getting back to basics in his DNA.

John Fixx is head of school at The Country School in Madison, which serves children from preschool through eighth grade. The last time I interviewed him was on (brace for it) Nov. 8, 1987 at the Jim Fixx Memorial Tod’s Jog in Greenwich. John’s father got Americans back on their feet in the late 1970s by popularizing jogging. Jim Fixx’s father Calvin — John’s grandfather — added an “X” to the family name a century ago with the reasoning that “a verb cannot be a name.” Such is the logic of a journalist (he was a Time magazine editor). I submit that the family business is still fixing problems.

My last interview with John was in the auditorium at Old Greenwich School. It was so long ago that my other interview subjects that day included the Winklevoss family, including the now famous twins Tyler and Cameron. They were 6 at the time, decades away from claiming Mark Zuckerberg stole their idea to create Facebook.

The perils of social media are at the core of our discourse. We are joined by Teresa Sullivan, director of marketing and communications for The Country School, and Jennifer Butler, the school counselor. The only time I say anything that surprises them is when I make the point that their youngest parents probably had cell phones throughout their own childhoods.

“Gosh, is that true?” Sullivan says.

“Wow,” Fixx adds.

“Oh, that’s awful.”

Their own observations reliably take challenging turns. That’s what good educators do. Fixx manages to cram Napoleon and Sisyphus into the same thought. I tease Sullivan when she summons the word “yore.”

“English teacher,” she shrugs.

When I mention being educated in Catholic schools with dress codes, Fixx points to a recent shift in the reputation of private institutions.

“Good parochial schools and independent schools are paradoxically countercultural in a way they didn’t used to be.”

It was my turn to say “wow.”

But it’s Butler who adds a perspective that should sway anyone vexed by this debate. She came to The Country School three years ago. Before that, she worked at a school where kids had access to phones.
 
“Ninety percent of my school day as a counselor would be taken up by drama coming from cell phones,” she recalls.

Butler makes the point so casually that I stop her to confirm the 90%. If you need a before-and-after demonstration of the corrosive impact of phones in classrooms, that’s enough.

She recounts group chats that would end with the subject arriving in her office in tears.

“The person it was said about has the floor just drop out underneath them. They are sitting in their math class and they are no longer focused on anything school-related because everyone who received that text is just looking at them.”

Locked security doors can’t keep such messages from harming students in other schools. Then teachers and administrators — and sometimes police — have to get involved.

Butler and Sullivan wonder aloud if school districts that restrict phones will see a rise in grades, test scores and attendance. How can they not?

Fixx stresses that “we are not as heroic as you might think.” The intention of banning phones wasn’t designed to address mental health issues, but simply to keep students engaged.

That was circa 2012. Butler cites that same era as when she noticed a dramatic rise in students bringing phones to school. Think about it. The iPhone came out in 2007. As parents got upgrades, kids got hand-me-downs.

That’s merely anecdotal evidence. But it’s valuable when it comes to gauging the impact of electronics on the wiring of a child’s brain.

Butler noticed the difference immediately when she came to her current job three years ago. She illustrates the “before” model by assuming the universal pose of a student with chin on chest while navel gazing a phone. The move to a school without phones was dramatic.

“It was lively. The kids are engaged and talking with each other and laughing. It’s a totally different experience,” she says.

It’s different for parents as well, and that’s where the toughest learning curve may be in the months to come. Real-time check-ins can be reassuring for parents and offspring, and when there’s a lag between responses, anxiety can set in. 

So a lot of parents will be going through a form of withdrawal in the weeks to come. Fixx mentions that when his students take a camping trip in Utah, many parents put AirTags in backpacks.

It’s another paradox.

“You think you’re keeping your child safe by staying connected by phone, but what you’re really doing is taking away their independence,” Fixx opines.

Country School parents haven’t blanched at the phone policy, according to Admissions Director Pam Glasser. But they have the advantage of time. For too many Connecticut students, a phone is oxygen. For parents, it’s an umbilical cord.
 
Connecticut schools that embrace the state’s guidelines could see transformative changes. No more pocket texting or TikTok challenges in school bathrooms. There will be bullying. But it won’t be cloaked by virtual shadows.

I ask the obvious question: What should teachers expect?

Butler doesn’t hesitate to raise her hand.

“Without cell phones where pictures can be taken and texts sent you have kids who are unapologetically, authentically themselves without the fear of judgment.”

She considers the bigger picture.

“I think it will be a beautiful thing.”

Welcome (back) to a Brave Old World.

Back
341 Opening Hill Road, Madison, CT 06443
P. 203-421-3113  |  F. 203-421-4390  |  Health Office F. 860-469-2550
Founded in 1955, The Country School is a coeducational, independent school serving students in PreSchool-Grade 8. The Country School is committed to active, hands-on learning and a vigorous curriculum that engages the whole child.