Building Empathy in the Elementary Years

In today's world, empathy isn't just a nice-to-have quality—it's an essential life skill. At The Country School, we recognize that teaching children to understand and share the feelings of others is just as important as teaching them to read, write, and solve math problems. Through our comprehensive Social-Emotional Learning curriculum grounded in Responsive Classroom principles, we weave empathy education into every school day, from Kindergarten through 3rd Grade and beyond.

The journey begins in Kindergarten with a powerful concept: the invisible bucket. "We start the year by reading Have You Filled a Bucket Today?," explains Devon Piekarz, our Kindergarten teacher. "Children learn that everyone has an invisible bucket that fills up when people are kind and empties when feelings are hurt. What's powerful is understanding that when you're unkind to others, you dip from your own bucket too—because it simply doesn't feel good to be unkind."

This bucket-filling framework gives our youngest learners concrete language for abstract emotional concepts, laying the groundwork for deeper empathy development. It's our number one school rule in action: Be kind.

Character education and empathy building can't be confined to scheduled lessons—they must happen in the moment. First Grade teacher Stacey Koenig describes how this looks in practice: "Recently on photo day, a student came in wearing a t-shirt while others wore dressier clothes. Some children questioned his choice, and he was in tears. We stopped everything, gathered together, and discussed how those comments made him feel. Kids often don't realize the impact of their words until we pause and really pay attention to those teachable moments."

This responsive approach to social-emotional development reflects The Country School's commitment to prioritizing emotional intelligence alongside academic achievement. Throughout our 11-year educational experience, students learn that healthy relationships and self-awareness are foundational skills for both personal and academic success.

In 2nd Grade, empathy becomes embedded in classroom structures themselves. Teachers Chester Sharp and Samantha Oceguera guide students through creating a class charter—a collaborative process that asks children to think beyond their own needs. "Students consider not only what they need to feel safe and do their best learning, but also how others want to feel when they come to school," Sharp notes. "This process builds empathy right into our classroom rules and expectations."

The 2nd Grade global studies curriculum further develops these interpersonal skills through purposeful units on welcome versus unwelcome behaviors, bullying prevention (especially during National Bullying Prevention Month in October), and the important distinction between tattling and telling. These lessons give students practical tools for navigating social situations with empathy and integrity.

By 3rd Grade, students are ready to proactively extend empathy to their peers. Third grade teacher Caitlin Hurtgen describes how recess becomes another opportunity for character development: "We're teaching children to notice when someone is playing alone and consider approaching them. We ask, 'How can you help someone feel included if they want to be included?' It's about looking outside yourself to see how others are doing."

This outward awareness represents the culmination of years of intentional social-emotional instruction—children who not only understand empathy as a concept but actively practice it in their daily lives.

Our approach to empathy education reflects our broader philosophy: Social-Emotional Learning is as valued as traditional academic learning. Through Responsive Classroom methodology and daily attention to character development, we help students develop the "soft skills" that research shows are critical for success in school, the workforce, and life. Students gain self-awareness, learn to manage emotions, build healthy relationships, and develop the capacity to make responsible decisions—the intrapersonal and interpersonal skills that define authentic human development.

When empathy becomes a way of being rather than just a lesson to be taught, children thrive. They become more confident learners, better friends, and compassionate community members prepared for whatever comes next.

Want to see Country School in action? Join us for our Open House on Sunday, November 2, from 1:00-3:30 p.m. Meet our admission team and community members, tour our campus, and learn about our admission process and curriculum. This free event is open to the public—bring a friend!

Can't make it on November 2? We're offering School Day Open Houses with tours at 9 a.m., 10 a.m., and 1 p.m. on November 4, 17, 18, 19, 20, and 21. Come see how we put kindness into practice every single day.

At The Country School, we're not just teaching empathy—we're building a generation of kind, aware, and emotionally intelligent young people ready to make the world a better place.